(Memories) Ever since you said Goodbye
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Ever since you said goodbye,
memories of us were the only thing
to get me by
Memories of...
the way things used to be
Memories of...
the love you made with me
Memories of...
your kiss and the times we spend
on nights like this
Memories of...
your sweet face and feeling
your warm embrace
Ever since you said goodbye,
memories of us were
the only thing to get me by
The things we did when we were in
love are those I have memories of
Memories of when you said
that you'll always be mine
for all time
How I loved you so much
and how we feel whenever we
touch
Days and nights I held you
beside me believed that this love was meant
to be and how we thought it would
be eternity
Ever since you said goodbye,
memories of us were the only thing
to get me by
The things we did when we were in love
are those I have memories of
I remember your smile, how you asked me
to stay for awhile and all those moments we had
together and thought it would be forever
But now I'm lonley with you in
every memory
How could I let you get away
God knows
I can't deny that I can't go another day
without you
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I like it! Will be able to come back and critiue it when I have time. See ya on the other side!
I will start by saying, yes it
was a lovely poem.
However, ever and since are two
words, not one.
I like the series of "memories
of..." but the one that goes on for 2 lines:
Memories of...your kiss and the times we spend
on nights like this
doesn't seem to fit as well,
because the rest are one-liners and it flows well that
way.
Also, it's unsettling to the
reader that sometimes you use punctuation and sometimes you don't.
In free-form poetry and the like, punctuation is how the reader
knows where and when to start and stop each line... it's not read
one line at a time. You should either 1. use punctuation everywhere
that it's needed or 2. uses none and let the reader roll with the
words, finding their own rhythm.
Other than that, it was pretty, and seems heartfelt.
Oh my.....that touched me. It reminded me of what I used to have. It's so perfect. I read things I relate to, because it allows me to feel a connection to the author. I enjoyed that....thank you. Please keep up the great work.