Thank you very much for critiquing Raphael. You've pointed out some areas that definitely need some improvement. Thanks so much for the suggestions and the encouragement.

Thanks for your perspective on the deer story. I was an avid hunter for 50 years, and as you suggest in your alternate,my dad was not , not at all.
I created some emotions here and that is the purpose.
I generally do humor ,if you check my other stories,
I will be posting a werewolf one in a few days. it has already been accepted by Werewolf magazine for their Sept issue. Your ideas would make a contrictary story to counteract mine.
thanks for your considerable efforts and good work.
Cheers
R

Ben-

I appreciate that you took the time to critique 'Dusk Swim'. You gave me exactly the type of feedback I was looking for. Thank you so much!

-Kel

hey, ben--
glad to see you active again! and with a new story, no less. awesooome. *singsong*
i'd love to join your saturdays group, if you're open to additional members. my stories have been dribbling over the 1k mark lately...

Welcome back.

I would like to join the Short Story Second Saturday group. How do I do this?
Thanks!

So how does one get an invite to "Short Story Second Saturdays?"
I also have an obscure reference to teaching in my profile, in the "occupation" entry.
How 'bout a spot for a fellow teacher?

I got to get better at proofing:
I typed the word hardware I meant software.
Like at CNET.com and so on.
Peace

Thanks for the comment on Carry My Cross - I'm glad you liked it I've never thought of submitting it to a mag, but I might look into that now. Happy Easter!

You may or may not have noticed that ten billion people "critique" you whenever you post something. There are always nitpicks, but the main thing to bear in mind in that huge numbers of people want to read what you write. The not-so-great stuff just sits there with no critiques. Remember that, okay?