The House at the end of the Lane
short story, realism, elderly, residential homes, community living
Published on:
Feb. 23, 2008, 8:01pmWord Count:
2581Work Description
Talks about a residential home for the elderly and the residents within it
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disruptive nuisance of herself. Every
day, no matter what the weather, except for the deepest snows of
winter, she would walk into town. She
carried two purses – one a decoy and one which held her
possessions. Off she would go, her
decoy prominently displayed on the front of her walker, her real
purse tucked under her arm. Since
everyone in town knew that was what she did, it wasn’t much of a
secret. Once, one of the children in
the home, a high school student who didn’t much like school, asked
Cassie to review a report she had written. Her assumption was that Cassie would add more to
the report and improve its quality. On
the morning the paper was due, the girl went to get her
report. Cassie had taken a red pen and
had written all over the paper, correcting it, and then giving her
an F at the bottom. It was the last
time anyone ever asked Cassie about anything related to
school.
Fay June was a sweet, gentle man – a homosexual who was doted on by the ladies. The ladies of the home didn’t know of Fay’s sexual predilection, he was a private man and they were past the age of political correctness, so it was a secret the family kept for him. The mother of the family quietly went to his room every morning to help him wash and dress. Fay had a cactus, seven feet high. He had received it as a little boy and it had grown with him from a few inches to its final splendor. When Fay died at 93, the cactus died with him in a matter of days. The irony is that the cactus was as sharp and hard to be near as Fay was soothing and gentle. . . .it was as if all of any negative emotions Fay might have were housed within the cactus.
Alta Beattie was 95 and a wisp of a woman when the family first started the home. She had survived a double mastectomy and constant life traumas. The eldest girl could remember going to Alta’s porch and sitting with her when she was a child, not really talking, just spending time together. Alta was a small woman, seemingly delicate, but with an iron disposition that had served her well. Alta and her husband had run a country store in a remote little town with a population of 300 on a good day. The church and the store were the only two official buildings, all other land was taken up by the farms in the valley. The branches of her family trees lived throughout the valley and in the neighboring towns. When her daughter came to visit, she would totter in, in worse physical condition than Alta, calling out, “Hi Mommy!” It was unnerving to hear that coming from so old a voice. Every morning Alta would wake by 6:00 and put the earpiece of her radio on so she could listen to religious music. In her high, thready voice she would sing along, her voice the only thing anyone else was hearing. She was blind but she had a stack of Bible verses about three inches thick. She would work her way through the pile, reciting the verses softly, each one memorized and in order. At age 103, she fell and broke her hip. The doctors said she would never walk again. In six months she was managing just fine, thank you very much and lived for another three years.
Marjorie was Alta’s roommate. A solemn woman, slim, thoughtful, and intelligent, she had been a teacher for many years but had lost the desire for words. She sat quietly in her rocker, silently watching the rest of the inhabitants of the home. She wore of mask of stillness, never letting emotions slip out to mar the surface. The silence was often inadvertently mistaken for indifference by those who didn’t know better. After being in the home for several years, Marjorie discovered she had inherited a disease her mother had died a very painfully death from. Marjorie had no desire to undergo the pain her mother had, and it was
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Discussion
I read your story with interest for a couple of reasons, not the least being that I've spent three decades of my life sharing life with older adults. I was interested to see how your piece would portray them; what sorts of attitudes I could detect. I think that for the most part, you kept a respectful, almost reverent attitude toward the guests of the rest home, which is their due, whether they be fictional or real.
There were some inconsistencies in verb tense in various places throughout the piece, as well as a choice of incorrect words or spellings, such as:
Over everything is a faint air of musty, vaguely pungent, old body sweat, even while the ceiling fan sluggishly churns the air around.
I would suggest substituting "odor" rather than "sweat"--sweat is not wrong, but odor is more subtle and covers a multitude of odors a person may exude.
In the summer the guests like to sit out on the porch and help shell peas and snip beans for supper as well as to be frozen for the winter ahead.I believe the correct term is to "snap: beans, rather than "snip" them. This phrase is also used near the end of the piece.
They live in quarters upstairs from most of the guests, although there are a few who live in bedrooms close by.This sentence is missing "away" between "upstairs" and "from." This paragraph, describing the family is especially strong--very nice.
Thank you for letting this piece be read and I wish you the best.
This is a fine piece of writing. You've captured wonderful character descriptions in your snapshots. My mother-in-law lived in an old house quite similar to the one you've described. The primary difference was her assisted living home was only for women. Thank you for reminding us all that even though people do get very old they are still individual - some good, some not - and they all have a place in the world.
I truly enjoyed reading this work.



I'll be honest. I'm sitting here trying to figure out why I was so captivated by this story. I think because it conveys the idea that these homes are no less interesting than the Smithsonian, really not so different from a museum. I don't think that there's really anything I can critique in a negative way as far as style, only a few grammatical and spelling slips. You did a good job of reminding us that the people who live in these homes are people just as we are, and they have needs just as we do. I'm impressed that you found a way to make this into a true story, rather than just a biography of "inmates". Clever title as well. Masterfully done, especially your introductory description of the physical layout of the home itself.