hmm....i like the ideas presented here Ezra. I felt like I read two completely different poems. You start out with such elevated poetry the first three stanzas, and then the last two become increasingly informal. Perhaps you did this intentionally, but I don't think it is quite right. I'm tempted to advise you to seriously make two seperate poems. It honestly looks right now as though you spent hours on the first three stanzas, and then wrote the last two in less than a minute. The first three stanzas are so good, you could add a little more to it and it would be fine by itself.

Then again you obviously wanted to convey one thought with this poem, so let me propose a few ideas to unify this work. First I would propose you add a strict meter to this poem, it is so close that it would not take too much effort to do so. As far as the last two stanzas....you either need to upgrade your diction or.....Make the whole poem satirical. I honestly think you would do well to make a satire poem, and a "serious" poem using these stanzas. What do you think?

I really like this poem Ezra... I think that it is very well written...

I’d rather stand on my own and be wrong,

Than take the chance of them being right,

I’d rather stand alone against a million,

Than fade quietly into the night,

I really like this stanza a lot... This is one thing that I can relate to myself personally in this poem...

I would definitely stand alone against a million than fade too...

keep writing

Nikki J.

I like this but something about it just isn't quite there yet. um... what is a "yesteryear"?? that kind of confused me ....  I do think that the comments toward MTV and U-Tube are kind of funny and add a touch of humor but are then i question if they fit with the rest of poem or do they belong in another poem!! Think about it    ....  you do have a good start

Keep writing!!

Good luck

 This poem's strength is that it is absolutely clear.

 That's why I don't get bent about some of the things in the other critiques like the last two stanzas being rushed...I get the feeling that you did it that way on purpose to create a sense of urgency, like putting a lift in a song at the point you want to do that.

  I don't personally care about meter, or structure, since your message is clear.  (Ever try to read Ezra Pound?)  By all means work on it if you're not satisfied with it, but I don't see anything so glaring that I think you have to.