In his hands
poetry, inspirational
Published on:
May 4, 5:07pmWord Count:
104Work Description
it's a poem: inspirational
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In His
Hands
Everything is in his hands; that’s true;
that doesn’t mean our hands be at rest,
we have to do our part right on the cue
if we do the best, then he does the rest!
Our life is a gift from him to all of us
How we spend it is our own doing
Finding the purpose unknown to us
He sure will guide upon our asking!
As we get caught up in our busy life
Forget the purpose, ignore direction
choices we make could be a strife,
only in his hands we feel protection!
Jaya H.
Written on 5/1/08
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i would first like to say that i enjoyed this poem; it is very uplifting.
although the poem is uplifting, there are some changes i would suggest.
in the first stanza, these two lines throw me off:
Everything is in his hands; that’s true;
and
we have to do our part right on the cue.
the first line is fine. it kinda of gives an idea as to what the rest of the poem is about. in my opinion, the second line should be different. although both lines have near the same amount of syllables, 9 and 10, it feels awkward for me to read. i think the second line is too wordy and the ryhme sounds forced.
in the second stanza, there is a suggestion i would like to make.
instead of:
Our life is a gift from him to all of us
i suggest:
our life is a gift from him to us.
i think it flows a little better that way.
in the third stanza, there was a grammar mistake.
As we get caught up in our busy life
it should read:
as we get caught up in our busy lives.
i also recommend you use some type of puncuation throughout the poem. i believe that will make it flow better.
i liked the content of your poem and look forward to reading your future works.
Happy Sunday,,
Your meter is perfect, and I love the subject matter.. And of course you are so right.
You might appreciate my poem "The truths you tell" because it seems that you understand the concept of relationship rather than religion.
Faith is a hard thing to convey to those who do not understand it from relationship.. It is like the wind,, you know not where it comes from, or where it goes, but you see it's affect all around you.
You did a good job of conveying this,,, Protection comes from knowing that you are in His will,, and that you are at peace with your relationship.
Hope to read more soon.