hey, joe--
sorry to see you go! i hope your work slows down a bit, gives you the time to come back soon.

Hi. Thanks!

It's not so much the fact that the ideas are old that bothers me. It's more that I was a really bad writer. Huzzah!

thanks for the welcome

Hey Joseph, thanks for the two reviews. I certainly will take up your offer for any Navy help if I have questions.

That's true, but most of my older stuff is fairly bad. Alas, my misspent youth, and so on.

I've always liked traveling. Tons to see, interesting people to meet, and new ideas for writing! Sure, the military isn't ideal, but neither is vagabonding through third world countries, haha.

Thank you for your comments on MSI. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
-Ben

Thanks for the critique on "Think"! I think you're right about the colon. The quote thing, too. I wasn't expecting to get too much of a positive feedback for that, since I dredged it up out of the "stuff I wrote 3 years ago" area, but I think I'll go back over it since I did get a few people who said they like it. Thanks!

Thanks for the welcome, man. I appreciate it. How are things? Navy life treating you well?

hi, joseph--
thanks very much for your feedback on 'automated systems, inc'! i'm glad you liked it, and appreciate your suggestions.
(you know, i'm not sure what 'demon seed' is about! i referenced it thinking there'd surely be a lot of screaming in a movie like that. )

Hey "Joseph". I'm just another person here...not a lot going on. How are things in Japan? Are you really there?

Thanks for the welcome!

Thank you for the critique of Apple Tree. I always struggle with voice and I never can decide whose voice to right with, my own or the characters. Your insightful comment reminds me to keep working on this. Thanks.
-Ben

Huge thanks for the critique - I like to hear both what I'm doing right and what I need to work on I'll have chapter 3 up as soon as I rack up enough karma.

Thank you for the comment! I am glad to hear you liked it.

Thank you for the welcome! Posted my first poem so who knows! Maybe we will run into each other on here sometimes. Later!

Dear Joseph -- Thank you for your very kind critiques! I'm delighted you've enjoyed the stories, and I'm equally grateful for your comments on refinement. It's a real pleasure to be on the site & to meet you. Laos

Thanks for the welcome ^_^ I'm just starting to get settled into this community and I look forward to getting more involved in the future!

Thanks for the welcome. =D

The essay has seen like, 2 different classes (that I remember) and it got A's both times. It's also been read by classmates in both those classes, and I've only ever gotten positive feedback on it. I have more like this though (not all of them good), so I'll be posting the best ones and MAYBE the merely acceptable ones.

Dude, take your time with the story. Please. I'll kill you if you rush and give the audience crap, so take your time with it. I've already read and seen too much stuff with great plots and characters, but something went wrong in the undertaking, so the final product was bullshit. I'd really hate to see you end up like that. You're smarter than that. Take your time. Forget what I said and be lazy! haha

My sister's reading The Worst Evening of the year now. What have you read of Stephen King? I got to reading King years before Koontz, so I've only read Odd Thomas, Dragon Tears (my favorite so far) and Night Chills. I plan to get back to King's short stories after I finish Odd. What are you reading now?

thanks for the critique! i appreciate your comments.

Hey dude, thanks for the critique. I didn't even know you existed on this site and suddenly you have 35 points already and you're in my circle. I also grew up on Animorphs, Goosebumps and Everworld, as well as The Babysitters' Club, which you loved, I'm sure (jk) but right now I'm reading Koontz's Odd Thomas series. What Koontz and King books have you read?

Hey Joe!
Thanks for the critique on Kiss and Tell - I will go through a read some of your stuff in turn, I added it to my reading list. Good catch on the nodding comment! You are so right! The sweet potatoes and the piranha, gun, and bloody contract were the 4 elements of the freewrite prompt we had to work into the story - so I did what I could. If you are interested in the freewrite workshop - there is a really cool site (free)....www.12freewritingworkshopsonline.com - all different genres and experience levels - its really neat. Thanks again! Merry Meet and welcome to Scrib!