Hello!  This is great first draft, but I feel that it could be more with simple rewordings and little explanations here and there.

The first thing I noticed was your introduction of Krystyl.  You have a very original spelling for her name (which helps emphasize her own originality in this "sea of sameness"), but her introduction isn't too special.  If you could find a way to slip her into the reader's consciousness, you wouldn't necessarily have to say "Krystyl was different."  They would already know and even be surprised by her different-ness. Consider something perhasp like, "But in this sea of pastels and tanned bodies was a tower of black, swathed around a pale body.  This tower was Krystyl."  Or something like that.  It can also help emphasize what you want her to be seen as: is she strong to be opposing the popular styles?  Is she just a whiney kid who feels like being different?  Your descriptions can help give more insight into this.

Also, you might want to expand a little on what differentiates her friends from everyone else.  When they meet at the stone circle, are they similarly all in black, or do they have their own style?  Is this group an outsider version of the cliques in the schools, or are they actually individuals coming together?

Again, this is a great beginning.  Keep working with it.  There's so much potential here, and I'd love to see what you do with it! Good writing!

 hi, kay--

i think you've got good stuff here--a great tone, characters we're interested in, truthful descriptions. this short piece is a solid beginning to what could be a much larger story.

The hallway was loud. It was crowded. Everyone was dressed alike. Bright colours, name-brand labels, and similar styles on everyone made it seem like one horrible teenage movie.

your short sentences read like an outsider reporting on the scene. this works for Krystyl, as she sees herself. i'd suggest avoiding using general terms like "It" and "horrible" too often in place of more powerful words, especially in flash fiction--every word is precious. be specific, let us visualize your fictional world as clearly as you do.  you give us a good feel for this scene by using different senses: we can hear, see and feel the chaos of the school hallway.

Krystyl, however, was different. She stood out in the sea of pinks, whites, yellows, and oranges. She wore black, always black. He hair was black, her skin pale, her eyes blue and surrounded by black eyeliner. She stood out in the crowd, yet she was invisible. Nobody noticed Krystyl, and that's the way she wanted it to stay.

here, you introduce your main character. we instantly know Krystyl's different through your physical description--the black she incorporates into her look, her wish to fade into the background while the other girls wear loud, splashy colors. we have a feel for her right off, and also suspect there's more to her. my only suggestion here is to adjust the sentences you're using to state outright what you've shown us with description. trust that you've communicated your meaning for who Krystyl is through her actions and style, and show us how she prefers to stay invisible, rather than tell us.

They could keep their perfectness at a distance. They always had their hair fixed just right. Their clothes always neat and new. The girls always had cheery makeup on. They talked in loud, obnoxious voices that could be heard outside the building. They talked so much, yet said so little. Krystyl shied away from them all. She never made contact. They never acknowledged her. It made her day.

lots of great elaboration on your previous statement about these girls. i wouldn't say this paragraph moves the story forward so much, but it adds flavor. you might even consider incorporating it into your previous paragraph setting the scene. same suggestion stands for those general descriptives, like "just right", "obnoxious". these are great opportunities for a strong, vivid metaphor. i love a creative, effective metaphor! i wonder if the word "perfectness" might work better as "perfection"? "perfectness" jumped out at me, a little distracting from the flow.

They were always tan, and seemed to have a glow about them. Krystyl was always pale. She never tanned. She didn't see the point in it. Why try to look like everyone else when she could be herself? In the sea of sameness, she was a lone bouy of originality.

more details, effective but beginning to feel like a list of descriptions rather than a discrete story--beginning, conflict, resolution. i'm curious where this is going, what Krystyl's up to. i think "bouy" is misspelled--might  want to doublecheck that. great word, though, continuing your sea metaphor. nice!

Yet, at the end of the day, she wasn't alone. Every day, she'd go to the stone circle. It was a special meeting spot in the middle of the woods. Every day, she'd meet her friends there. They, too, went to schools where everyone was the same. They didn't care. They had each other. It was enough to keep them going in their separate schools that lacked originality. The stone circle is where they met. The stone circle is where they'd always meet. It helped remind them that even while they are all alone, there is always someone else who was in the same boat as them.

a-ha! okay, this is getting interesting. i am intrigued by this gathering, this stone circle. it almost has a mystical feel to it, and i long for more about this place. you stopped writing just when it was getting going! i like your comparison of the outsiders to people stranded at sea--it's a strong image, and we can feel their sense of isolation from the mainstream, and their camaraderie with each other. i think you could create some unique characters here, and even give them some reasons why they're off on their own. maybe it ties into this stone circle...? i'm just saying.

i know it's the cliche thing to say, but i'm gonna say it--this story should be longer! it feels like a sketch for yourself, notes on the beginning of a story. you said you didn't like it much, but i think it has potential to be a much deeper adventure. i hope you decide to return to it.

thanks for posting your work, kay--i enjoyed reading!

I enjoyed this story, I could visualize it easily.

There are some things I would do to make this even better.  I liked the contrast between her and the others with the differences in colors, but instead of talking about how much black Krystyl wears, perhaps you can use more metaphors.

They talked so much, yet said so little

 

This is a great little sentence.  You sum up teenage 'perfection' so well.

It is tough to really elaborate much in flash fiction, so I think when writing it one needs to be more concise and deliberate with their words and at the same time be colorful and creative.  That is why I commend anyone who can write it well.  Your story is not bad at all.

 I like the idea behind this a lot. The concept of being different, especially in school, is not a new one. I myself went to a performing arts magnet high school. It was essentially like someone took all the different kids from the city, and threw us in one school. It was kind of nice. We had all the freaks and artists in one building.

My main criticism is in your sentence structure. I like the descriptions and comparisons you made, but there is not much variety in sentence structure. My favorite line was:

In the sea of sameness, she was a lone bouy of originality.

I like this line not just because the metaphor is nice, but also because this sentence is structured differently from the others. I think some variety would make a big difference.

Other than that, I enjoyed reading it. Write on,

-dnm