...pulling that tattered ace from his breast-pocket/As an introduction every time/I’m a card, he would say

I think that this is my favorite line in this piece. I know this guy...I think I've probably been this guy more than a time or two. It's a great line that, for me, is full of subtlety. Old jokes die hard and routines dig ruts that become our graves.

But I digress. I think you've written a great piece about the unbridled enthusiasm of young summers. Any outlet is a good outlet. You really made this come alive for me.

Another positive point is that your free-form line breaks seem to have meaning and add to the piece...something that I often find lacking in free-form pieces. They set me up well and lead nicely into stanza conclusions.

One thing I am unclear about: what exactly are BT's? From the lines:

and came to rest in rainbow park for BTs in the playhouse and bullshit on top of the jungle gym

I don't think that it takes away from the piece not knowing; rather I think that it adds a really personal feel. But curiosity got the best of me, so I have to ask.

This is well written and well done. Personally, I felt that you captured the nostalgic ghost of the past quite well. --EMF

Thought this was great!  Very nostalgic, very good at evoking my own nostalgia.  (Even though it was a long freaking time ago that I was 14!)

Anyways, very good, very enjoyable.

ohh yeah i know just what you mean...i've just never heard BT before. thanks.

This is a very direct piece, it speaks openly and clearly to the reader. I like that you call it a biography as it does have elements of a memoir. As it is, it provides a full account of a night out while letting the reader know it is not really just a single night, but a typical night of many such nights--which also lets the reader peer in on the group culture as well. I've read a couple of prose written books that came to mind while reading this, they were very effective in getting across the look and feel of not only the setting but the style and persona of each character. I definintely enjoyed reading this and look forward to more  prose biographies, should you choose to write more.

Louise

Not only did this capture oh-so-many memories from my youth, it also brought my spirits up. This was a really fun piece to read. I can honestly say that you'll be hearing from me again on your other works. This was very well written. I'm not one to critique grammar and punctuation, so I'm not going to. But the content was beautiful. I use the word beautiful because if the good times we had with our friends while we were kids isn't beautiful then I don't know what is. Great job on this piece. Keep it up. I look forward to reading more of your work.