Short but very to the point. I like how you say in the poem that you have no answer for death like so many don't. But your piece. I like how you capture true mourning of someone who has lost a child even though the material memories are put away and out of sight nothing can remove the stain of tears that not only you can see but the tears deep inside the soul that you can't. "They were molded on her cheeks," that is true and heartfelt sorrow that can be felt. I love what you did with this poem.

You painted with your words a piece of someone in mourning and confusion.

Bavo!!!!

This was a great poem.  I especially like the "Why is death?" line.

But, still Mama cried.
Why is death?
she asked me,
And I tried to remove the tears,

But like hot metal
They were molded to her cheeks.

My only question is "who is ME in this?"  Another daughter?  A son?  It just seems strange that somebody's mother would ask them about the death of one of their offspring.  Something the other way around seems like it would make more sense.

Also, I think "welded" makes more sense than "molded" in this last sentence.

Nice work overall!

[Please ignore comment.]

I like this poem, but right now I'm going to focus on metre because this piece has a serious problem with it.  Now I'm no expert on rhythm, so I don't really know the proper way to describe what I'm talking about, but I'll do my pest.

When Steffie died,
She lived on
as tears on Mama's cheeks.

Here we're getting a sense of rhythm, the idea of iambic.  It's a little stiled, but that's okay.

The bright colored dresses
with delicate lace

These two lines have very strong rhythm. I believe it is called "Dactyllic", but I am not sure.  It gives the reader the sense that these kinds of rhythms will continue through the whole piece, and it creates a great sense of expectation for the movement of the poem.

However, this does not happen.  These rhythms are nearly accidental, as the most of the rest of the piece has no established metre to speak of.

It might seem picky, but this is a huge problem.  You can't have moments of strong rhythm without intention and proper management, or it creates the wrong expectations.  Your reader begins to read for rhythm, and then there isn't any, and they're confused.  I personally think this piece work very well with an established metre, but that's just me.  However, I do know that because of these (seemingly) unintentional moments, the piece is significantly weakened.

 First off, overal this was a very good poem. It was precise in getting right to the point and carried a strong sense of emotion that you could really feel. It sounds alot like its a younger daughter or something and that she is having a hard time understanding and coping with the death of this girl Steffie.

The imagery in this was very realistic and very well written. I thought it was beautiful in an almost musical way and it was really, really clear. I could see it all painted in my head.

I realized that you seemed a bit inconsistent with the use of commas. It seems like there should be a comma after basically every line.

Some of the words you have infused into this piece are very powerful.

But like hot metal
They were molded to her cheeks.

 

I found this conveyed a very strong emotional point. The imagery was very strong.

This story really does make you see how short life can be and how hard it must be to loose a sister or a daughter, it wouldn't seem fair, wouldn't seem right.

It would be very interesting if you made a sequel to this poem conveying how the mother was feeling at the time. It sounds like shes tortured and by asking the question "Why is death?' (which is a very powerful question, probably the most powerful verse in this poem that could break anyone's heart) shows this. But by asking her, I'm guessing the "me" in this poem was her daughter, it actually hurt the "daughter" as well because it made her contemplate such a thing and broke her heart that she couldn't answer her wounded mother.

I think you should make it a little more clear at who this "me" is by stating how she feels about Steffie's death, not just about how the mother feels, this might clarify some more for this is a poem that leaves you with many questions as well as an emotional stain on your heart.

I enjoyed it dearly.

Keep up the good work.

~Michelle Erin.

I like it. It's my favorite poem that I have read today.  

I noticed that cried comes toward the end of the sentence in the beginning section of the poem and I think it would be nice if cried came at the end of the sentence in the following line in the later section:

And I cried too

Perhaps you could change it to: "And I too cried."

I would like cried to stand out more to convey the sorrow and pain that were endured, and that are still being endured, in the feelings conveyed throughout the work.
 

It's my .02 worth, but overall I like your poem very much. I would be proud to have written it myself.

What a beautiful poem.  It is full of strong imagery

And I tried to remove the tears,
But like hot metal
They were molded to her cheeks.

and also

When Steffie died,
She lived on
as tears on Mama's cheeks.

In the following stanzas

The bright colored dresses
with delicate lace
and the dolls with button eyes
were put away,
But, still Mama cried.

you give the poem a time context.  It has been a little while since the death. Usually it is a matter of weeks before a person's effects are packed away - when they are a child's, it is even longer, so we know the mother has been struggling for some time.  It is so hard for a child to find a parent's answers - the questions hang in the air for what feel like centuries, both people aching and not able to heal that wound.

Why is death?
she asked me,

"Why is Death" is a puzzling question for me.  I don't know if it is simply because I would frame it that way or that I am that obtuse - either could be true. 

Anyway, thank you.  It was a pleasure reading this.

I get the point. It is very sad, and, yet, it isn't. It's short, to the point, and has a great meaning. When you write a poem, it should be like that. A poem doesn't have to have a meaning, but it's easier to understand. Why does the wolf hunt, if not from hunger? Get what I mean? It is hard to lose a loved one, as the mother expresses in her tears. I can see the crystal glass tears running down a gray woman's face.