I wonder about you
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As I sit in wonder of you
In all of your magnificent grandeur
Your beauty, which surrounds me
Everyday, your reflections
I see it in
All of your humble creations
In search of you and all of your beauty
I sit and wait and wonder about you
The sun beating down bright and holy
All this open space
I feel your breath caressing my face,
Or was it just a breeze
Or whispers from far away
I look around and still I cannot
know all of your wonders
Am I somewhat blind?
I wonder about you, and yes
Often I speak with you
It feeds my soul
So why is it that I still
feel so alone
Your Love and Grace
Where are you? I wonder
I cannot hear you
Deaf perhaps
Or just in slumber
You should know all of me even when I
Refrain from speaking your name
This journey is painful and I fear
I am lost
Without you
I do not know who I am, not
All of me, not just yet
I need you more
Than you need me
I am only your servant, so let me
be of service if only to me
Just for a little while , till I feel whole again.
And not lost in search of you.
And wonder everyday
To reach you, I need to feel again
Bless me with sight
Reveal to me what I must be
To understand you and this journey
You choose for me
Be my nourishment I seek every day
I do believe you know me
It’s me …remember, I sit in wonder of
you every single day
So! Come into my spirit and show
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Discussion
I like how some of the stanzas are repeated. The language is vivid and captures the reader's attention. I love how all the senses are interconnected with the spiritual guide from a greater being. You emphasize sight, sound, and sensation.
This is definitely a really great poem. You conveyed your message well and I most appreciated that it didnt rhyme as so many poems do on this site. The form was ok, just not the way that i would have done it. I thought that the lines were a bit broken up and that made it not flow as well. I also found that you probably should have used more punctuation. There were points that you did one second and then the next there was none. That also would have made it flow better. Yet, I could still relate to it. Had it flowed better there would have been more sympathy as I read and had the punctuation been a bit more consistent i could have concentrated more on the content vs the structure. But, all in all this is a good poem. Keep Writing!
Hi, I thank you all for your input, it is most aprreciated.
I will take note of my flow and grammer....my sore point...
warmth to you all
Thank you



Sorry, I've got nothing critique here. (l.o.l)
Anyway, this was a fine piece you put down and really down to it with spiritual guidence.
BET once said: "Rated Next"!