On Five, by Karissa:   “Why don’t you run away like the others, Cheryl?” “You’re too close to me,” he warned her. “People wo... » Read more...

On A Haphazard How-To Guide to Mazatlán, by Lauren Morton-Farmer: Hello, I think this could use a little more organization. It was written well, but I just felt it wavered between being total... » Read more...

On Cannon Ferry Lake, by Kara Anne Laughard: When I was about halfway through this piece, I thought I knew what my main critique was going to be. Now that I'm done, I... » Read more...

On Mute, by Circus: Just a quick comment. I think the material is good, but written as prose it got a little wordy for me. Maybe hard on the eyes... » Read more...

On The Saga of Harold, by Nathan P.: He stood upon a hill and looked down at the grassy field yawning flat and vast, stretching as far as one could see. Silence, ... » Read more...

On Bus or Africa, by Arthur Soteris: Hi Arthur, I read this a long time ago and just now am writing about it, so I apologize if I sound disjointed. Overall I thin... » Read more...

On Lazarus, Chapter 1: Going to a Duck Hunt, by Kieran Thomson: Hi Kieran, Well, I definitely got a sense of character in this story, but I was waiting for the plot to develop. That wouldn&... » Read more...

On Anyan, Chapter 1: Nature's Cruelty, by Grace Claudia: It would be half-expected that the following meeting would occur in the dead of night, with a thunder cloud roaring ominously... » Read more...

On Of and On Ned Moon, by P.F. White: Mine has been a remarkable life, for it stands to reason I am a remarkable man, and mediocrity has never been the fate of any... » Read more...

On Secret Dreams, by Rhema Amachigh: Randy’s eyes darted down to the counter, and then back up. “Uh…uh…” Then "backed" up She had turned and walked seve... » Read more...

On Goryokaku Autumn, Chapter 1: Prologue: Hakodate, Japan: 1854, by D. Owen Scott: They were keeping busy tending the small fire and preparing some tea. I think you could use a little more description of the ... » Read more...

On Sapphire Bright, by N.I. London: No artificial light illuminated this area, but the moon sufficed. I think this sets the mood you're looking for, but it s... » Read more...

On Whispers of Darkness, Chapter 1: Any Given Sunday, by Joseph Nagy: It was a quiet, normal middle-lower class neighborhood. On normal days, the place would be having a peaceful spring afternoon... » Read more...

On Ancient Glow, by Royce Utley: P.S. The dogs sure are acting agitated tonight, I can't for the life of me figure out why. -From the journal of George Co... » Read more...

On Aphrodite, by Steven E.A.: But love is the most deceptive of the muses. It is the most deadly. Like smelling a rose scented with poison, or kissing a ma... » Read more...

On Kane, Chapter 0: Monotone Dementia, by Mark Allen Jr.: Your title for your work "Dimentia" should be spelled "Dementia." I think it's just a typo since you spell it correctly o... » Read more...

On Voluntary Confinement, Chapter 1: Voluntary Confinement Ch. 1, by MrPrinceton: Trees whipped about in the wind whose voice was as sorrowful as any human cry, and tossed hair about in a silent rage. since ... » Read more...